I don’t want to talk about my marriage today. Today I want to focus on my baby. I spend so much time steering the conversation away from baby talk because I don’t want to become ‘that woman’ that I hardly ever give myself the chance to enjoy my baby.
I went to the doctor today. I heard the heartbeat – twice! He/she is growing strong. I had a scan although sadly I couldn’t see anything. They don’t let you see the screen while its taking place and they printed a crappy picture. But I’m going back for a detailed scan on Friday so hopefully that makes up for it! My due date has also been moved back by two weeks. I was initially disappointed by this but when it comes down it, its for the best. I want my baby to have the best chance at life so this is a start.
It still doesn’t really seem real. I look in the mirror at my bump and think ‘where did that come from? I love feeling my baby kick – its the most amazing feeling ever. But it still hasn’t really sunk in that in three months or so time I’m going to be bringing a little person home from the hospital. I am actually going to be a mom!
No matter what happens now, my life is never going to be the same again.